Coddling Gone Mad!
When and will it ever stop? Everyone's a winner. Trophies for everyone. We don't keep score. Many games end in a tie. Pass/Fail grading mentality. No class rankings. It seems as though we continue to sink to new levels of coddling young people today. Where is the incentive to work harder and strive to be better? We're turning this country from a winning mentality to one of "first loser." Just when you think the coddling threshold for this generation has been reached, it falls to an even lower mark.
The West Potomac High School in Virginia has banished the dreaded "F" from the grade/report cards. Instead of F's, students will receive marks of "I" for incomplete, indicating that students still owe their teachers essential work. They will get F's only if they fail to complete assignments and learn the content in the months to come. The change in the educational philosophy is intended to encourage students to continue working toward the mastery of material rather than accepting a failing grade and moving on.
What does this accomplish? For one, it gives teachers less leverage while setting unrealistic expectations about the real world. Students need to learn that you don't get a continuing string of "do-over's" in life.
Isn't the fear of failure a powerful motivator? It has been for me throughout my business career. By eliminating F's, you send a definitive signal to kids that they can do whatever they would like, and it's not a big deal. Failure is deemed acceptable in that paradigm. Where is the discipline, the drive and commitment to be great? This is learned and ingrained in the school years.
Don't F's have a purpose? It is to demonstrate that rules and standards are in place. If you don't meet them, you don't pass. If you don't do the work, there are consequences. Isn't there an obligation to prepare young adults for the real world? Will the continued protection of a child's self-esteem know no end?
The notion of all children being "special" has no place in the real world. It has fostered a decline in personal responsibility. In business, not everyone is special. The same holds true in every competitive endeavor. There are winners and losers. Second place is worthless. People will tell it like it is. Check your feelings at the door. In the business world "I"s lead to "F"s. Failing in business is very real.
Learning at an early age that some people are better than you is beneficial. It teaches you to be better, to work and compete harder. If you lose, you have three choices. Accept it, get better or quit. I worry that accepting or quitting behavior is the new paradigm. No wonder foreign competitors are eating our lunch. When do we say enough is enough? Maybe Forrest Gump was truly prophetic, "Stupid is as stupid does." It perfectly sums up the pervasive coddling of children that exists in this country today.
Keywords: West Potomac High School; Coddling Young; Abolishing "F"'s; Everyone's A Winner
Well said, I couldn't agree more. I'm going to ask my boss for a raise because I almost landed the big new account.
Thanks for the support Bill. I have been telling my kids to "suck it up" for years!
What a world we live in. It certainly tells us alot about the folks educating our kids. I am starting to believe that home schooling is a better option.
While not everyone always excels at everything they do I agree that there is an important lesson to be taught about hard work and perseverance. I remember someone once saying that not everyone possesses the qualities of a leader but that it is equally as important to be a great follower. After all, we wouldn't have any great leaders if there was no one to follow them, right? But I do think that it's important in life to know the value of hard work no matter what goals you're working towards. Eliminating the "f" among other things certainly is eliminating the value of hard work.
Nothing of value in life comes easy, and I think this concept is often forgotten in a society that prefers immediate gratification--including younger generations. While teaching kids about accountability begins with parents, the classroom is another critical venue for helping them learn that failure can breed success. There are certainly shades of grey in life; however, the pass/fail environment that West Potomac HS is now creating could very well be a detriment to these [potentially college-bound] students who may not be as prepared to adapt to the trials and tribulations head of them in the "real world." Sometimes things simply need to be learned the hard way.
Coddling never got anyone anywhere. Even if the pursuit is recreational, you want to succeed, however you define that succees. Let me explain. I have danced flameno for over 12 years "for fun." Professional dancers have told me it's the hardest dance forms of all to master. For the first few years, I'd practice the night before the class, and did okay. Then, I started to practive a few times a week.(Why be okay when you can be better?) I then joined my teacher's summer dance troupe. From Day 1, my teacher told us she would treat us like professional dancers (read: I am going to scream at you, and if you can't take it, you'd better leave now). I was mortified when she called me out in front of my fellow dancers and said if I didn't have the steps, I couldn't dance the first show. After she calmed down, I told her I would do my best. She looked down her nose at me and said, "Your best isn't good enough. You have to be the best." No one had ever said that to me. I practiced that dance for days. In the morning, at 6 am, and at night too. I'd do the steps when I was standing in line for coffee or even at the gas pump. I succeeded. Two years later, I can still dance that dance. It's actually one of my favorites.. intricate, expressive, passionate--pure flamenco. I doubt I would have worked that hard had she not been that hard on me. Hard work is the price of entry for a satisfying life. Or, at least, for my life.
Bill, could not agree more. Now, would you please take on the town recreation leagues that impose "silent sidelines" on parents? Only question is whether that is designed to coddle the kids or their coaches.
What a great observation on today's educational scene. if we don't allow kids to experience failure than they will never appreciate success! Anybody who has been successful in life has likely experienced more failures than successes. In all liklihood the failures helped create the success. You know the phrase "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger!" It is true. To sheperd kids past self esteem crushing failure does nothing more than continue to degrade the self esteem. But, to allow students t experience the product of their actions and then teach them how to gain from it - now that is teaching and learning at its best. Too many of us quit when if we stuck it out we could achieve what we wanted to achieve. That happens because we fear failure and therefore miss what it takes to be succesful. No one ever won a SuperBowl, a world series, an olypic Gold medal, a Nobel Peace prize without staring down the face of failure and plowing ahead with courage and belief. We need to restore that concept if we ever want to rise above medicrity. Great thoughts here Bill!